We All Change: Letting Go So You Can Grow
Nov 19, 2024In my new book Once Upon A Place, it's all about personal growth and transformation and especially those fun and mesmerizing symbols of stories, myths, and tales.
Personal growth comes in many forms: from talking to a therapist or counselor, self-meditation, group discussions. It also (and importantly) comes through stories, those tales and myths we've grown up with that are full of imagery and symbolism.
In stories, personal growth is shrouded (or obvious). It's heralded by symbolism and imagery, often mystical and fantastic imagery of wolves or snakes or apples or blood. In the stories, young men raise their swords and young women eat pomegranate seeds. It's all a metaphor for growth and change.
And one of the most important metaphors is sacrifice. Letting go. Understanding that in order to grow, we must let go of something that is holding us back at Stage A so that we can flourish and reach Stage B.
In stories, the metaphor of sacrifice can be very literal and sometimes (especially in fairy tales) even gruesome. Or it can be the mundane sacrifice of letting go of childhood and growing into an adult.
Here, we shed some light on this ultimate metaphor of the world's stories: letting go.
The Idea of Sacrifice in Life and Literature
I call these images “dualities,” as there is something opposite and yet complete within each set of symbols: for instance, Chaos and the Void, Descent and Resurrection, and the Beast and the Guide. These are all dualities or "opposite sides of the same coin."
Sacrifice is one of these bigger-than-life metaphors that can help us understand where we're at in life. The idea of sacrifice is that to grow stronger and leave the old you behind, you must let go of something that was otherwise important, special, or sacred to you.
For instance, children grow into adults. It may seem like a natural part of life, but emotionally and socially, it's a big sacrifice. They must let go their childish natures, go through puberty, and become responsible adults. But puberty isn't the only time we have to sacrifice something in order to grow. When adults face a challenge in their families or in their work, they must sacrifice their ego, or their fear, or some idea of themselves as inadequate or “not enough.” (Or they must sacrifice the idea that they already have it all.)
Letting these falsehoods go (and giving them to the beast in the story, who happily eats them) is part of the rite-of-passage of both childhood and adulthood.
Letting Go for Something Better
In some households, people try to follow a silly but notable rule: when going to the store to buy something (a treat such as a toy or a book or clothing), they must donate something. Realistically, this helps reduce clutter in the house, but philosophically it’s an idea of letting go of something to get something (hopefully even better) in return.
This is the idea of sacrifice, and in the world tales I feature in my book Once Upon A Place, the presiding notion is that we let go of something that is NOT serving us, that is holding us back or that is keeping us timid or small. This is the essence of growth and positive change.
When we let go of that which is a barrier, we open doors and can finally become stronger, more mature, and more of our best selves.
Once Upon A Place: Forests, Caverns and Other Place of Transformation in Myths, Fairy Tales and Film is available for pre-order now! Purchase from your favorite bookstores or order from Amazon, Llewellyn, Barnes and Noble, and anywhere you get your favorite books. Go here for more info about Once Upon A Place.